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I was recently faced with a moment where I had to

I was recently faced with a moment where I had to either: abandon myself and defy my first hand experience to “go with the flow” and keep the peace (something younger Emily very much would’ve done) or stand up to a “powerful” man.

Nothing about it was easy, but the stakes were high, so I gathered my gumption and clearly explained why his way wasn’t going to work.

He said I was making things complicated, that I was difficult. Then, when I wouldn’t succumb to his (deeply flawed) logic, he attempted to insult me by saying, “Wow, you run a lot of masculine energy.”

Along my inward Quest, I’ve discovered words like that can only stick if you actually already hold that belief about the self. After 14 years of unwinding the coils the patriarchy has wrapped around me since birth, his words slid off me like raindrops on the waxy feathers of a white faced wandering duck. I simply knew they weren't true.

He had no idea that Mother Ocean, who sometimes gently laps at the shore and other times rages like a stormy sea, has shown me again and again that the feminine is anything but one dimensional. Afterall, what is softer + stronger than water?

All our lives we have been told we are supposed to be "sugar and spice and everything nice." As soon as we speak up, have a different opinion, go with our own flow instead of the (often patriarchal) crowd, we are sat on and told that we are "bitchy", harsh, and now--in the new age spiritual circles too yang and running masculine energy.

Slow down cowboy! The Divine Feminine is never one thing. She is the sun AND the lightening, she is the screaming mama at birth and the lilac field at the break of day, she is Pachamama, Mother Ocean, she is run by tides and the waxing moon.

Don't ever let anyone tell you what you are, especially when you speak from the intuitive heart. You know your own mind, your own power and fierce grace. Just shake it off like so many drops of rain. Or howl like the she-wolf at the moon. But stay true to the beautiful, wild complexity that is YOU! 👯‍♀️💛💫

Did you know that along this wild ride called life

Did you know that along this wild ride called life we all endure 2 deep dark nights of the soul? More, if you welcome the growth that comes from being on the spiritual Quest.

In moments of despair it’s easy to fall into the false belief that you’ve done something wrong, turned left on elm street… failed at the law of attraction and are a loser.

Many nights I tossed and turned on my tear stained pillow, berating myself for my life not looking like I thought it should. It must be my vibration, I thought. Everything’s energy right? That’s what they say.

Well, after many years of spiritual study with masters, plants and spirits themselves I can say, it’s true that everything is energy, but this existence has layers upon layers of simultaneously existing truths and the law of attraction is just one part of the cake.

Should you find yourself in the middle of a dark moon, 🌚 know that you’re not off your path. You are a warrior goddess who courageously choose the themes to conquer this lifetime. For the skeptics… sure nobody would consciously CHOOSE harm, illness, bankruptcy, but that's not how spirit sees it. Spirit sees opportunity to know healing, compassion, resilience.

The great squeeze is never easy, but when you pull back the curtain and see the divine intelligence running through all things, I’m a loser sounds more like this: “Shiiiiiiiiiiite I must’ve been feeling mighty brave that day... probably bored with so many lifetimes spent in the ether hanging at the cosmic cafe and said, “I’m ready for action. I got this!” and signed on the dotted line for all the challenges, obstacles, frictions and foes that would allow you to conquer your earthly mission.

Should you find yourself in a season of constriction, the 🔑 to the bright beautiful rebirth that awaits is something called sweet surrender. Surrender isn’t giving up… oh no no my dears. Surrender is the grace to accept the moment, the person, the situation, exactly as it is. It’s in this radical acceptance that you enter a powerful space to receive the wisdom (gift) that your higher self is after. In the aftermath you begin to see the glimmer of hope that’s the light of your new dawn. 💫

Through sheer grit I endured pumping and chapped n

Through sheer grit I endured pumping and chapped nipples to get Saïa Moon 7 months of milk but it left a scar in my psyche. The trauma of those early days when she was losing weight week after week haunted me thoughout my pregnancy with Teo.  Well my friends, nobody is more surprised than me that I joyously gave him the breast for a year!   Tag your new mama friends and save this if you plan on being one, because as those ol’ wise wizards say, hindsight is 20-20.  
Tips to have your milk runneth over:
 1. Even if you know you need to have a c-section (for whatever reason) do everything you can to have allow your body go in to labor, naturally or by induction if necessary. This allows the right hormones to fire, alerting your pituitary gland to inform the ta-tas it’s milk making’ time!

These messengers also let your body know that you just gave birth and it’s time to heal and put everything back in it’s original place.   2. Eat as much fresh fruit and smoothies as you can. Breast milk is primarily sugar water aka glucose (not fat as commonly thought). It’s no wonder my milk was in short supply with Saïa. I was still living in fruit fear, subsisting on a high protein + high fat diet that was totally acidic and dehydrating.   3. Let your baby feed as frequently as baby wants. If it’s every ten minutes, feed him every ten minutes. If baby wants to feed for 2 hours, just surrender, life will be easier in the long run. Baby, sets the schedule for how much milk he needs.

I am overjoyed by this year of sweet bonding with my angel baby Teo. Who at 1 is now 18 lbs of love. This is truly the baby that fruit made... it’s no wonder he’s so sweet. 🍓

If you’ve read The Quest 📚 you know all about

If you’ve read The Quest 📚 you know all about my messy days… where in the wake of heartbreak “just having a good time” began to border on legit addiction. One drink flowed easily into a bottle and then a second. Do stupid things, bad decisions, drama, regret. Drink more, push it down, do more stupid things, more bad decisions, more drama, more regrets…round and round I went.   Who knows where I’d be had I not found a more conscious path, but I’d make a hefty wager it wouldn’t be this international sun soaked life with my beautiful family. I wouldn’t have the honor of leading inspiring women on one-of-kind transformational retreats, and guiding women to call in soul stirring love, and I sure as hell wouldn’t have written a bestselling book.   Thankfully, at some point in the hazy fog of my hangover, I started felt an urge that there was more. But back in those days, if you found yourself caught in a web of compulsion, the only options were super $$$$ residential rehab or AA. Neither felt right for me.   When my friends @dradijaffe + @sophie.jaffe founders of @igntd.me shared their IGNTD Hero Program with me, I got chills. THIS is exactly what I needed back in the day. Finally a program that blows away the notion that people with drinking problems are all helpless alcoholics and doomed to a life of suffering.

Hero throws away the silly (and unsupported by research) belief that anyone who needs help must commit to lifelong abstinence. These days, I have the very occasional half a glass of wine--that’s really all I desire. It feels so liberating to have this relationship with alcohol.   IGNTD gets to the core issue in a nonjudgmental, convenient and affordable way that’s never before been available.   Addictions nearly derailed my life and then addictions destroyed my first marriage. Having a healthy relationship with alcohol is 🔑 to true joy and realizing your full potential.

So if you (or someone you love) is ready for a change, click my linktree in bio. Perhaps this is the answer you’ve been looking for? Oh and I almost forgot to mention, you can try it for completely free for 14 days! 💛

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